[原创]外国网有“牛”论 诙谐搞笑 [翻译参赛]

善恶皆有因果 收藏 19 4840

SOCIALISM

You have 2 cows.

You give one to your neighbor.SH主义:你有2头牛,你送给邻居一头。

COMMUNISM

You have 2 cows.

The State takes both and gives you some milk.

GC主义,你有2头牛。国家都拿走分给你一些牛奶。REAL Communism:

You have two cows.

You and your neighbor both tend the cows and share the milk according to

how much each of you need for your families.

真正的GC主义:你有2头牛你和你的邻居都照料牛,分享牛奶按需分

配。

FASCISM

You have 2 cows.

The State takes both and sells you some milk.

法西斯:你有2头牛。国家都拿走,卖你牛奶。

NAZISM

You have 2 cows.

The State takes both and shoots you.

纳粹:你有2头牛。国家都拿走,杀了你。

BUREAUCRATISM

You have 2 cows.

The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk

away.

官僚主义:你有2头牛。国家都拿走,杀了一只,另外一只挤奶然后倒

掉牛奶。

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM

You have two cows.

You sell one and buy a bull.

Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.

You sell them and retire on the income.

传统资本主义:你有2头牛,卖掉一个买一头公牛,繁殖,经济增长,

卖掉养老。

ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND (VENTURE) CAPITALISM

You have two cows.

You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of

credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a

debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four

cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.

The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a

Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who

sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.

The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on

one more.

You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving you

with nine cows.

No balance sheet provided with the release.

The public then buys your bull.

苏格兰国家银行 :你有2头牛,你用信贷在上市公司卖3头牛,借款/利用股权交换获得第4头牛,通过免税获得第5头。第六头牛的牛奶股权通过仲裁转让渠道,在大开曼公司的幕后拥有者那里,通过董事会卖出股权,这样你拥有7头牛。然后年度财务报告上说你有8头牛,还可以再加一头。你卖掉一头牛去买个美国总统,你会有9头牛。没有财务负债被纰漏,而后公众还会买你的牛。

SURREALISM

You have two cows.

The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.超现实主义:你有2头牛,政府要求牛交牛吹口琴。

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.

Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has dropped dead.

美国:你有2头牛,卖掉一个,强制剩下的牛产出4头牛的奶最后,请个砖家来分析牛是怎么死掉的。。。

A FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you

want three cows.

法国:你有2头牛,你继续罢工,组织暴动,阻断公路,因为你想要有3

头牛.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and

produce twenty times the milk.

You then create a clever cow cartoon image called a Cowkimona and market

it worldwide.

日本:你有2头牛。你重新设计牛让牛变得只有一般的牛十分之一大,

让牛产20倍的奶。然后你炒作一个聪明牛的卡通形象动漫,卖给全世界

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.

You decide to have lunch.

意大利:你有2头牛,你不知道牛在哪,你决定还是先去吃午饭。

A SWISS CORPORATION

You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you.

You charge the owners for storing them.

瑞士公司:你有500头牛。但没有一头属于你。你只是替牛主人看牛。

A CHINESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You have 300 people milking them.

You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.

You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

敏感不翻。。。。

AN INDIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You worship them.

印度公司:你有2头牛,你把它们贡起来。。

A BRITISH CORPORATION

You have two cows.

Both are mad.

英国:你有两头牛,都疯了。。

AN IRAQI CORPORATION

Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.

You tell them that you have none.

No-one believes you, so they bomb the ** out of you and invade your

country.

You still have no cows, but at least you are now a Democracy.

伊拉克:每个人都说你有很多牛,你告诉他们你没有,没人相信你,然

后他们轰炸你侵略你,你现在仍然没有牛,但是你民主了。。

AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

Business seems pretty good.

You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.

澳大利亚:你有两头牛,看起来还挺富裕。于是你关门歇业,去喝酒庆

祝。

A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION

You have two cows.

The one on the left looks very attractive.

新西兰:你有2头牛,你觉得左边的比较好看。

》》》》》》》》》》》》》》》》》》

在网友回复时看到的,顺手复制了,链接滴没有~请原谅。。。

本文内容为我个人原创作品,申请原创加分

[ 转自铁血社区 http://bbs.tiexue.net/ ]

3
回复主贴
聚焦 国际 历史 社会 军事

猜你感兴趣

更多 >>

热门评论

美国:你有2头牛,卖掉一个,强制剩下的牛产出4头牛的奶最后,请个砖家来分析牛是怎么死掉的。。。铁血网提醒您:点击查看大图

伊拉克:每个人都说你有很多牛,你告诉他们你没有,没人相信你,然

后他们轰炸你侵略你,你现在仍然没有牛,但是你民主了。。铁血网提醒您:点击查看大图

ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND (VENTURE) CAPITALISMYou have two cows.

You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters ofcredit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute adebt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all fourcows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.

The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to aCayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder whosells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.

The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option onone more.

You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving youwith nine cows.

No balance sheet provided with the release.The public then buys your bull.皇家苏格兰银行资本主义

你有两头牛。

但是你谎称你有三头,然后用你在银行工作的小舅子开的信用证把它们卖给你的上市公司

接着你用债权换股权买回四头奶牛,还获得了五头牛的免税。

然后,你又利用一家在开曼群岛注册的公司做为中介将六头牛的挤奶权卖回给你的上市公司。

在这个过程中,挤奶权变成了七头牛的。

年报显示你的公司拥有八头奶牛,还有多一头的期权。

你于是卖掉一头牛去赞助了一个新的美国总统,你现在有了9头牛。

没有资产负债表会被发布。

公众继续狂买你的牛。




A SWISS CORPORATION

You have 5000 cows.

None of them belong to you.

You charge the owners for storing them.

瑞士公司:

你有5000头牛。但没有一头属于你。

你找牛的主人收管理费。



A CHINESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You have 300 people milking them.

You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.

You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

中国公司:

你有两头牛。

你有300个挤牛奶的工人。

你宣称你拥有100%的就业率,并且有很高的牛制品生产率。

你逮捕了报道真相的那个记者。

19条评论
点击加载更多

发表评论

更多精彩内容

经典聚焦

更多
发帖 向上 向下
广告 关闭