今年七月，记者 Zinn 接到朋友的email，说“那个你一拍成名的军人上周六自杀了，我想你应该要知道这事”。Dwyer 自伊拉克回来后精神抑郁，逐渐养成依赖药物的习惯。而让他一夕成名的照片迫使他成为公众人物更令他苦恼，也使生活的适应更加困难，最后竟然走向自杀一途。Zinn 知道以后非常难过，当然参与经历战争对一个人心灵的影响很大，可是 Zinn 一直检讨自己“无意”间拍摄使 Dwyer 成名的照片是否也间接害了他？他在人们记忆中的形象是个救命者，可是他却因为这个形象而赔上自己的生命。一张无心的照片引发一个美国记者对一条人命的省思。
Medic in famous photo dies after PTSD struggle
By Kelly Kennedy - Staff writer
Tuesday Jul 8, 2008 6:35:20 EDT
Pfc. Joe Dwyer carried a young Iraqi boy who was injured during a heavy battle between the U.S. Army's 7th Cavalry Regiment and Iraqi forces near the village of Al Faysaliyah, Iraq, on March 25, 2003. Dwyer died of an apparent overdose at his home in North Carolina on June 29, 2008. WARREN ZINN／FILE（ArmyTimes）
2003年3月25日，一等兵 Joe Dwyer 在 Al Faysaliyah 附近抱着一名受伤的伊拉克孩童。
During the first week of the war in Iraq, a Military Times photographer captured the arresting image of Army Spc. Joseph Patrick Dwyer as he raced through a battle zone clutching a tiny Iraqi boy named Ali.
在伊拉克战争开始的第一周，军事时报摄影记者拍下了一张引人注目的照片，照片里是专业下士 Joseph Patrick Dwyer 抱着一名名叫阿里的伊拉克小男孩跑过战区。
The photo was hailed as a portrait of the heart behind the US military machine, and Doc Dwyer’s concerned face graced the pages of newspapers across the country.
But rather than going on to enjoy the public affection for his act of heroism, he was consumed by the demons of combat stress he could not exorcise. For the medic who cared for the wounds of his combat buddies as they pushed toward Baghdad, the battle for his own health proved too much to bear.
On June 28, Dwyer, 31, died of an accidental overdose in his home in Pinehurst, NC, after years of struggling with post-traumatic stress disorder. During that time, his marriage fell apart as he spiraled into substance abuse and depression. He found himself constantly struggling with the law, even as friends, Veterans Affairs personnel and the Army tried to help him.
6月28日，31岁的 Dwyer，经过多年与创伤后症候群的搏斗后，在他北卡 Pinehurst 家中死于药物过量的意外。在这段时间里，随着他坠入滥用药物和抑郁症，他的婚姻为之破裂。即使作为朋友，退伍军人事务部工作人员和军队试图帮助他，他仍然不断触犯法律。
“Of course he was looked on as a hero here,” said Capt. Floyd Thomas of the Pinehurst Police Department. Still, “we’ve been dealing with him for over a year.”
“当然，他在这里说被视为一个英雄，”Phoinehusrt 警察署的 Floyd Thomas 如是说，尽管如此，“我们还是跟他打了一年多的交道。”
The day he died, Dwyer apparently took pills and inhaled the fumes of an aerosol can in an act known as “huffing.” Thomas said Dwyer then called a taxi company for a ride to the hospital. When the driver arrived, “they had a conversation through the door [of Dwyer’s home],” Thomas said, but Dwyer could not let the driver in. The driver asked Dwyer if he should call the police. Dwyer said yes. When the police arrived, they asked him if they should break down the door. He again said yes.
他死亡的那一天，很显然的 Dwyer 采取了一种被称为 huffing 的药丸和吸入式用药方式。 Thomas 说 Dwyer 打电话给计程车公司派车来送他去医院。当司机抵达，“他们通过[Dwyer家]的大门对话，” Thomas 说，但 Dwyer 已经无法开门让司机进去。司机问 Dwyer 是否该报警，Dwyer 同意了，当警方到达时，他们问他是否该破门而入，Dwyer 再次同意。
“It was down in one kick,” Thomas said.“They loaded him up onto a gurney, and that’s when he went code.”
“他们一脚踢开门，” Thomas 说。“他们抬他上担架，就在这时候他死了。”
Dwyer served in Iraq with 3rd Squadron, 7th Cavalry Regiment as the unit headed into Baghdad at the beginning of the war. As they pushed forward for 21 days in March 2003, only four of those days lacked gunfire, he later told Newsday. The day before Warren Zinn snapped his photo for Military Times, Dwyer’s Humvee had been hit by a rocket.
Dwyer 服役于在战争一开始时领头进入巴格达的第7骑兵团第三中队。他后来告诉记者，当他们于2003年3月向前推进的21天里，只有4天里没有枪声。就在 Warren Zinn 拍下那张刊登在军事时报的照片前一天，Dwyer 的悍马遭到了火箭弹的攻击。
About 500 Iraqis were killed during those days, and Dwyer watched as Ali’s family near the village of al Faysaliyah was caught in the crossfire. he grabbed the 4-year-old boy from his father and sprinted with him to safety. Zinn grabbed the moment on his camera. The image went nationwide and Dwyer found himself hailed as a hero.
在那些日子里大约有500名伊拉克人丧生，Dwyer 看到阿里的家人陷入了 Faysaliyah 附近的交火区。他将那四岁男孩从他父亲手中抱出来并冲刺到安全区里。 Zinn 用相机捕捉了那一刻。照片随之在全美流传而 Dwyer 发现自己被视为英雄。
He did not see it that way.
“Really, I was just one of a group of guys,” he later told Military Times. “I wasn’t standing out more than anyone else.”
According to Dwyer, he was just one of many who wanted to help after the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11, 2001. He’d grown up in New York, and when the towers came crashing down, he went to see a recruiter.
据 Dwyer 说，他只是一个在 2001年9月11日恐怖袭击之后想要帮点忙的一份子而已。他在纽约长大，当大楼崩塌后，他就去找了一个征兵人员。
“I knew I had to do something,” he said. Just before he left for Iraq, he got married.
But when he returned from war after three months in Iraq, he developed the classic, treatable symptoms of PTSD. like so many other combat vets, he didn’t seek help. In restaurants, he sat with his back to the wall. He avoided crowds. He stayed away from friends. He abused inhalants, he told Newsday. In 2005, he and his family talked with Newsday to try to help other service members who might need help. He talked with the paper from a psychiatric ward at Fort Bliss, Texas, where he was committed after his first run-in with the police.
In October 2005, he thought there were Iraqis outside his window in El Paso, Texas. When he heard a noise, he started shooting. Three hours later, police enticed him to come out and no one was injured.
2005年10月在德克萨斯州 El Paso，他认为有伊拉克人在他的窗外。当他听到噪音时便开始射击。3个小时后，警察诱导他从房子出来，幸无伤亡。
Dwyer promised to go to counseling, and promised to tell the truth. He seemed excited about his wife’s pregnancy.
But the day he died, he and his wife had not been together for at least a year, Thomas said.
And almost exactly a year ago — June 26, 2007 — Dwyer had again been committed to a psychiatric ward. Thomas said police received a 911 call that Dwyer was “having mental problems relating to PTSD.” “We responded and took him in,” Thomas said.“He’s been in and out.”
就在几乎刚好一年前，2007年6月26日，Dwyer 再次进入精神病病院监护。 Thomas 说，警方收到了911电话说 Dwyer “有创伤后症候群相关的心理问题。”“我们就把他送去里面”Thomas 说。“他就一直那样进进出出的”
Military Times could not reach Dwyer’s family, but his wife, Matina Dwyer, told the Pinehurst Pilot, “He was a very good and caring person. He was just never the same when he came back, because of all the things he saw. He tried to seek treatment, but it didn’t work.
军事时报无法联络到 Dwyer 的家人，但他的妻子，Matina Dwyer 跟 Pinehurst 先锋报说，“他是一个非常好和关怀他人的人。只是当他回来后整个人变了，在他经历所有那些事情后。他试图寻求治疗，但没有奏效。”
She told the paper she hoped his death would bring more awareness about PTSD.
In 2003, Dwyer was still hopeful about the future, and about his place in the war.
“I know that people are going to be better for it,” he told Military Times. “The whole world will be. I hope being here is positive, because we’re a caring group of people out here.”
ps：创伤后症候群（PTSD）的定义为：一种焦虑疾病，由于经历过威胁生命的事件或伤害，而引起强烈的害怕或无助，有时候被称之为创伤后压力反应（post-traumatic stress reaction）以强调这个现象乃经验创伤后所产生之合理结果，而非病患心理状态原本就有问题。